it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
