I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Porn is love you can see.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
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