what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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