Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
