The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize