Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Where is the hickey?
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Randomize
