i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes