Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
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