i already hear my dad disowning me
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
My vagina is officially offended.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
