jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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