Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
