Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
