So drunk its hurt
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
