How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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