Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
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