So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
