maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Randomize
