its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
