New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
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