Having a random hookup so left but love u
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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