nut hugger
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
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