Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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