Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
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oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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