garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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