Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize