fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Boobs speak an international language.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
