you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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