okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
