It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
