Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
