DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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