Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize