so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
He felt like a one man threesome
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
