i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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