btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
it's like iHOP with fire
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
