I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
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My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
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I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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