So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
