hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
