Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Randomize
