at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
The police scanner is talking about you again....
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
We had sex on a dog bed..
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
