You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
It's Friday. Sex?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i will never coherently bang her
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
