I need help removing her.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Sorry my hands just texted you
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
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