I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
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