am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
