i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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