Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
