Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(815): View more from Illinois

wat bout pragnant strippers??

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings

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(574): View more from Indiana

its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.

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(614): View more from Ohio

over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(614): View more from Ohio

He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.

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(712): View more from Iowa

You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.

(712): View more from Iowa

On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.

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(330): View more from Ohio

Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.

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(775): View more from Nevada

I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.

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(380): View more from Ohio

Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.

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