It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
