I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
