weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
