You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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